~* ToXiC ReLaTiOnShiPs*~
I admit to being super lame 100% of the time. One of my biggest “guilty pleasures” (I am not guilty) is pop culture. I keep up with the Kardashians, I have seen Miley’s latest selfies, and of course I am completely obsessed with Taylor Swift (luv u tay 4eva.)
I think we are all drawn to anything remotely more exciting/dramatic than the life we are given. Even if you don’t binge watch terrible T.V. like I do…you probably aren’t completely unaware of what I am talking about. All of this said to bring up
Toxic relationships keep reality T.V. alive. It drives us to watch the MTV awards because what if another Kanye, Taylor, Beyonce moment happens??
One of my FAVORITE toxic relationships is SPEIDI.
As in Spencer and Heidi Pratt…as in The Hills…as in the episode that spencer made Heidi get out of his car OR my personal favorite when they got R E A L L Y involved with crystals. If you didn’t indulge in The Hills then this means very little to you. BUT trust me they were the worst and the best all at once.
As entertaining as toxic relationships are on T.V. they are horrible in life. I am not praising toxic relationships with this post…it is the opposite. I am bringing light to the guilty pleasure of unhealthy relationships. Maybe you are the lucky life that doesn’t have ONE unpleasant relationship in your life, but for the rest of us “the struggle is real.”
Toxic relationships are not always romantic. Toxins can live between best friends, parents, siblings, coworkers, relatives, classmates, etc.
“..a toxic relationship is a relationship characterized by behaviors on the part of the toxic partner that are emotionally and, not infrequently, physically damaging to their partner. While a healthy relationship contributes to our self-esteem and emotional energy, a toxic relationship damages self-esteem and drains energy….A healthy relationship is a safe relationship, a relationship where we can be ourselves without fear, a place where we feel comfortable and secure.”
Here are some tips/tricks when letting toxic relationships go:
- A toxic relationship takes two (or more.) It is not simply one person’s fault
- Take the high road. It is easy to get caught up in emotions and make a mess of things when trying to let go (trust me I know.) Look for ways around hurt when distancing yourself from someone
- Try to be as sensitive as you can to the other person. Maybe the other person doesn’t know that you feel this way. Sometimes the relationship isn’t toxic because of the person, but rather the impact they have on you.
- Conversation is key
- But quitting cold turkey is sometimes necessary
- Realize that it might be possible that YOU are causing similar discomfort to someone else. I know it seems crazy to imagine you are the problem. But be realistic.
- It is better to have a few positive relationships than a bunch of negative relationships. Quantity does not mean quality.
- Treasure those positive relationships. Always make sure that you are good to the people being good to you. Hold on to them. Treasure them. Buy them an icy.
- It is possible that you have a toxic relationship with material things. Like me with my T.V. shows or my attachment to my phone. Make time for yourself/ personal growth/ creativity/ health/etc.
- Most important is keeping a healthy relationship with yourself. I have struggled with depression in the past and many of the people I know deal with social anxiety, self-harm, depression, eating disorders, etc. Take care of yourself. Everyone deserves a life of love and happiness. The most important relationship in life is the one we have with ourselves.
Here are some Heidi and Spencer treasures. They have SO many photos with puppies.